All scores out of 5
Man Candy: This movie showcased two of the most delicious pieces of male dessert on the silver screen: Benedict Cumberbatch and Chiwetel Ejiofor. Men I love enough to learn the spellings of their complicated damn names.
Oh, Chiwetel. Your pretty eyes are just doomed to always play The True Believer, aren't they?
The Man Candy score is lowered by the utter lack of shirtlessness. Oh sure, we get a few nice looks at Dr. Chesty's atributes, but Mordo never so much as loosens his collar. And let's face it, a female superhero would have been NAKED when doing the astral projection thing. amirite?
(No, the Ancient One doesn't get nudie. She's the Wise Teacher trope. This does not invalidate my point. Also she should be Asian. Well, but 'wise teacher asian' is also a stereotype. But female would be good. Oo Ming-Na Wen. Down fangirl. But Tilda. I digress.)
Feminismishness: Pretty sure there are never two women on screen and conscious at the same time, but the aforementioned Ancient One does kick serious booty in a non-booty-showing way and I liked that there were two bad guy girls.
Hurt the pretty: Here is where the movie shines. Our hero gets his body battered and his mind blown every other scene! No spoilers, but it's pretty much a beat-down for the good doctor start to finish, and nothing makes a man hotter than getting beat down. In my opinion. Hush.
And we get bonus pretty men hurting in Mordo's angst and even Benjamin Bratt's perenial "that guy" is sweaty and grungy 100% of the time he is on screen which is pretty hot.
Bonus extra cool points: How about those bad guy eyeliners, eh?? I wanna wear that.
And the cape. The cape was dope. Dopest cape ever in the history of super hero capes. Sorry, Spawn, your crown just got snatched by sarcastic velveteen.
- Female Chauvinist Movie Review: Doctor Strange